Ever have one of those days that seem to start out pretty good, but as time passes, you realize that going to bed a few hours early may be the only thing that saves you from shedding some tears? Yeah, it's no secret, I am not a huge fan of Valentine's Day, I don't want to go into, why... just not a big fan. BUT that't not why this day could have been better.. well not the only reason. Burning dinnner, my entire house (including my clothes) smelling like smoke, kids fighting, I could go on for a while on this one.. but I won't.
Just a down day... guess everyone has them. I am no exception to the rule. So today was mine. I didn't use my one tear rule-- I am saving that for later. Today wasn't even close to bad enough to cry. Just frustrating that's all.
Today could have gone way better, but it could have gone way worse too!! Dwellng on my BLESSINGS right now! Thank God for the people who never forget to remember me! I love them!!!
Monday, February 14, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Haven't written in a few days..
Don't worry nothing's wrong, I've just been lazy with the whole blog thing the past few days. The last time I posted it was about not getting what you want. I didn't go into what was in my head, but I knew what I was talking about. :) Today, of course I don't feel the same as I did the last time I posted. That's one of those weird things ab out being human... our emotions fluctuate from day to day.. sometimes minute to minute. Things that seems so pressing, so important one minute don't seem so important the next.
I have a lot of things I want. AND the truth of the matter is God has blessed me with most of what I have asked for and absolutely everything that I need. When I want more, I actually feel bad. Like I am not appreciative of what I already have. I am so appreciative I promise... sometimes I feel bad asking for more.
God knows what's on my mind before I even say it... and he is reminded of it when I pray. What I am going to ask of myself is to put more effort into getting what I want. There are 3 areas I would like to improve.. I am not going to go into details, but here's the general idea. 1) Relationships- with God, family, friends, and yes even the romantic kind. I want to put more of me into my relationships. Of course this is a hard one because you can't control what other people do. So you never know what reaction you will get. I am just going to work on my side of this and hope that the reactions I get from my changing are favorable. 2) Financial- This is actually probably the easiest one. Not that I am rich, but just that the past few years have taught me to be super frugal. Now though it's time to start taking some risks to continue to move forward. 3) Physically- This is all me! Self-control ugh! I am going to have to depend on me to make good choices. YUK! I stink at this one!
What I am going to do is challenge myself to 30 days of improvement in each of these areas. I am writing my own personal goals (not online as they are personal) and seeing where I am by March 11, 2011. Don't worry I will write about them as I go. Now I am asking that you help me by doing the most powerful thing you can do.. pray!
You can't always get what you want. Sometimes you get what you want later than you thought you should have. Sometimes you never get what you want. Sometimes you have to work harder for what you want. Sometimes what you want is just handed to you... BUT always you get what you need just when you need it!
I have a lot of things I want. AND the truth of the matter is God has blessed me with most of what I have asked for and absolutely everything that I need. When I want more, I actually feel bad. Like I am not appreciative of what I already have. I am so appreciative I promise... sometimes I feel bad asking for more.
God knows what's on my mind before I even say it... and he is reminded of it when I pray. What I am going to ask of myself is to put more effort into getting what I want. There are 3 areas I would like to improve.. I am not going to go into details, but here's the general idea. 1) Relationships- with God, family, friends, and yes even the romantic kind. I want to put more of me into my relationships. Of course this is a hard one because you can't control what other people do. So you never know what reaction you will get. I am just going to work on my side of this and hope that the reactions I get from my changing are favorable. 2) Financial- This is actually probably the easiest one. Not that I am rich, but just that the past few years have taught me to be super frugal. Now though it's time to start taking some risks to continue to move forward. 3) Physically- This is all me! Self-control ugh! I am going to have to depend on me to make good choices. YUK! I stink at this one!
What I am going to do is challenge myself to 30 days of improvement in each of these areas. I am writing my own personal goals (not online as they are personal) and seeing where I am by March 11, 2011. Don't worry I will write about them as I go. Now I am asking that you help me by doing the most powerful thing you can do.. pray!
You can't always get what you want. Sometimes you get what you want later than you thought you should have. Sometimes you never get what you want. Sometimes you have to work harder for what you want. Sometimes what you want is just handed to you... BUT always you get what you need just when you need it!
Thursday, February 3, 2011
You can't always get what you want...
Boy is that true! Another snow day- means another day in the house- means tons of time to think- means tons of time to write. Before I get too far into this one, let me just say that I started cleaning my closet yesterday (my real closet that's not a figure of speech) and I got all of our laundry done. Of course there is more laundry already, but I still felt I accomplished something. :)
The trouble with being cooped up is it gives you way too much time to think. I already think way too much about things so you can imagine how crazy I'm going after being inside for a while.
Everyday I try to read a devotional. Usually I read the Proverbs31.com devotional right after I get to work. It really is my favorite and you can find a link to it at the bottom of my page. Some days I read it and I'm like.. "Oh that was nice." Other days, like today I read it and I am like..."Oh wow, I get it!" I have copied and pasted part of it below. (It's the bold/italicised part.) This particular entry was written by Marybeth Whalen.
February 3, 2011 Stay In the Shade
Marybeth Whalen
“There you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a father carries his son,
all the way you went until you reached this place.”
Deuteronomy 1:31 (NIV)
Last summer I ran almost every day, often in the hottest part of the day. As I ran I would anticipate the moments when I would run under the shade trees, receiving cool relief for a few moments from the unrelenting summer sun.
One day as I was running under the shade trees, I said to the Lord (I talked to God a lot as I ran), “Why can’t I just stay in the shade all the time?” To me this made perfect sense. I could run under the tree cover every day, always comfortable, always taken care of. Wouldn’t a loving Father want that for me, I reasoned?
His answer—as it often does—hit me right between the eyes. Well, that makes sense now, but how are you going to feel about that shade when it turns cold? I had to smile at His point. Staying in the shade makes sense sometimes, but other times it’s the last thing we need.
..........
I will be writing more on this later today.. I am just at a loss for words right now. Yes I'll admit it, I am thinking way too much and what's in my head is just not ready to be written down yet. Look for an update later this afternoon.. Until then, enjoy today February 3, 2011. Snowed in or not, it's the only one you will ever get.
The trouble with being cooped up is it gives you way too much time to think. I already think way too much about things so you can imagine how crazy I'm going after being inside for a while.
Everyday I try to read a devotional. Usually I read the Proverbs31.com devotional right after I get to work. It really is my favorite and you can find a link to it at the bottom of my page. Some days I read it and I'm like.. "Oh that was nice." Other days, like today I read it and I am like..."Oh wow, I get it!" I have copied and pasted part of it below. (It's the bold/italicised part.) This particular entry was written by Marybeth Whalen.
February 3, 2011 Stay In the Shade
Marybeth Whalen
“There you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a father carries his son,
all the way you went until you reached this place.”
Deuteronomy 1:31 (NIV)
Last summer I ran almost every day, often in the hottest part of the day. As I ran I would anticipate the moments when I would run under the shade trees, receiving cool relief for a few moments from the unrelenting summer sun.
One day as I was running under the shade trees, I said to the Lord (I talked to God a lot as I ran), “Why can’t I just stay in the shade all the time?” To me this made perfect sense. I could run under the tree cover every day, always comfortable, always taken care of. Wouldn’t a loving Father want that for me, I reasoned?
His answer—as it often does—hit me right between the eyes. Well, that makes sense now, but how are you going to feel about that shade when it turns cold? I had to smile at His point. Staying in the shade makes sense sometimes, but other times it’s the last thing we need.
..........
I will be writing more on this later today.. I am just at a loss for words right now. Yes I'll admit it, I am thinking way too much and what's in my head is just not ready to be written down yet. Look for an update later this afternoon.. Until then, enjoy today February 3, 2011. Snowed in or not, it's the only one you will ever get.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Hmmmm...
God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you... my daughter and I have been singing that song together. I like it. OK truth is I love it! It's a hopeful song.
If you don't know it the song by heart like we do.. here are some of the lyrics.
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Of course you know me.. it got me to thinking. How many times do we see signs pointing us where we need to go and we ignore them? Leads to some long days and sleepless nights. We let the craziness of our everyday life get in the way.. or worse we let our past get in the way of our future.
What I like about this song is what I like in movies, it has a happy ending! No candy coating the situation, the song talks about having many broken hearts before finding what was true. I talked to my friend Kortney today about having to have the downs in life to appreciate the ups. I agree with that! True happiness comes with a price tag that can only be paid through experience. Even my 15 year old daughter gets it.. well in her own silly way. She reminded me long ago that "you gotta kiss a lot of toads to find your prince." LOL
Snow days are getting a little out of hand- we have the rest of the week off.. ugh this is cutting into my summer! I feel loved today, February 2, 2011, and I am enjoying it because you guessed it, it's the only one I will ever get!
If you don't know it the song by heart like we do.. here are some of the lyrics.
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Of course you know me.. it got me to thinking. How many times do we see signs pointing us where we need to go and we ignore them? Leads to some long days and sleepless nights. We let the craziness of our everyday life get in the way.. or worse we let our past get in the way of our future.
What I like about this song is what I like in movies, it has a happy ending! No candy coating the situation, the song talks about having many broken hearts before finding what was true. I talked to my friend Kortney today about having to have the downs in life to appreciate the ups. I agree with that! True happiness comes with a price tag that can only be paid through experience. Even my 15 year old daughter gets it.. well in her own silly way. She reminded me long ago that "you gotta kiss a lot of toads to find your prince." LOL
Snow days are getting a little out of hand- we have the rest of the week off.. ugh this is cutting into my summer! I feel loved today, February 2, 2011, and I am enjoying it because you guessed it, it's the only one I will ever get!
My Ah Ha Moment... Thanks Oprah (AND Shellee)
Ok honestly I don't really watch Oprah very much at all, but Nana does and she fills me in on the points she sees as relevant to me....
Today is another snow day. While the kids are excited about it, I would rather be in school and get out for my summer! I love warmer weather. BUT I suppose it has given me some time to get some things done. I could certainly clean house today... more likely I will play, but I could clean house if I wanted to! :)
Now what was it I wanted to write about today? Oh yeah my "ah ha moment". I have them daily, but this one hit me just last night after a talk with my friend Shellee. Are you ready? This one is BIG!
Everything is NOT always my fault!
If I have questions about something and I ask the wrong way, that's because I am human. If I my feelings get hurt and I want whoever to make things right.. that's because I am human. It's not because of my past or any one in my past. Of course I have issues; everyone has issues, but my issues are no worse (or better) than anyone elses. As a a matter of fact, my biggest issue is being able to let people get close to me because I am scared to let my guard down. THAT IS MY BIGGEST ISSUE! Judge me if you want.. it's ok. I have been judged before, but if you actually take the time to get to know me, you will see that I have a ton of other amazing qualities that out weigh that "issue".
I'd like to take a minute to just go over the things that I do NOT have issues with. OK here goes..
I do not have an issue with loyalty. Once you are in, you are in!
I do not have an issue with commitment. (Actually if you look at my background.. I have been a little too committed at times.)
I do not have an issue with placing blame on others. (I usually place it on myself)
I do not have an issue with admitting I was wrong and apologizing. (I have even apologized to my children when I felt I had hurt them or done wrong by them.)
I do not have an issue with judging people. (I even try to walk away from gossip.)
I do not have an issue with always having to be "right".
I do not have an issue with always being negative.
Wow, I could go on for a while here. I'm thinking my "issues" don't seem quite so abnormal or large anymore. I am not an easy shell to crack, but the people who have taken the time to truly know me have stuck with me for a very long time. That's got to say something about me. If I was wrong, I will admit it and apologize, but not everything is my fault. Thankfully, I am not naive enough to buy into that theory.
Today is February 2, 2011. (Another snow day) Enjoy it! It's the only one you will ever get! For me I see sledding, snow angels, snowball fights, and a snowman in my future! :)
Today is another snow day. While the kids are excited about it, I would rather be in school and get out for my summer! I love warmer weather. BUT I suppose it has given me some time to get some things done. I could certainly clean house today... more likely I will play, but I could clean house if I wanted to! :)
Now what was it I wanted to write about today? Oh yeah my "ah ha moment". I have them daily, but this one hit me just last night after a talk with my friend Shellee. Are you ready? This one is BIG!
Everything is NOT always my fault!
If I have questions about something and I ask the wrong way, that's because I am human. If I my feelings get hurt and I want whoever to make things right.. that's because I am human. It's not because of my past or any one in my past. Of course I have issues; everyone has issues, but my issues are no worse (or better) than anyone elses. As a a matter of fact, my biggest issue is being able to let people get close to me because I am scared to let my guard down. THAT IS MY BIGGEST ISSUE! Judge me if you want.. it's ok. I have been judged before, but if you actually take the time to get to know me, you will see that I have a ton of other amazing qualities that out weigh that "issue".
I'd like to take a minute to just go over the things that I do NOT have issues with. OK here goes..
I do not have an issue with loyalty. Once you are in, you are in!
I do not have an issue with commitment. (Actually if you look at my background.. I have been a little too committed at times.)
I do not have an issue with placing blame on others. (I usually place it on myself)
I do not have an issue with admitting I was wrong and apologizing. (I have even apologized to my children when I felt I had hurt them or done wrong by them.)
I do not have an issue with judging people. (I even try to walk away from gossip.)
I do not have an issue with always having to be "right".
I do not have an issue with always being negative.
Wow, I could go on for a while here. I'm thinking my "issues" don't seem quite so abnormal or large anymore. I am not an easy shell to crack, but the people who have taken the time to truly know me have stuck with me for a very long time. That's got to say something about me. If I was wrong, I will admit it and apologize, but not everything is my fault. Thankfully, I am not naive enough to buy into that theory.
Today is February 2, 2011. (Another snow day) Enjoy it! It's the only one you will ever get! For me I see sledding, snow angels, snowball fights, and a snowman in my future! :)
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Trust
Trust.. hard to earn, easy to lose! You've heard all the sayings about how trust takes years to build but only minutes to tear down. Well.. That's true. AND of course it's true for me too! A while back, I was hurt... and by hurt I meant HURT BAD! Trouble with getting "hurt bad" and losing trust in someone is that you have a tendency to live your life with the gloves on and your guard up.
Don't feel like writing anymore.. will continue this later :(
Don't feel like writing anymore.. will continue this later :(
Priorities.. What are yours?
Priorities- Do you know what yours are? I am 100% sure of what my priorities are! BUT sometimes I let stuff get in the way of what I am sure of. Please tell me I am not the only one.
God
Family
Work
Then of course those are split up into categories.. like family -> kids first and then everyone else. My close friends are in this category too.
The one priority that I mess up with the most is God. So so many times I put everything else in front of Him even though I know better. But there is another priority that I seem to put low on my list on a regular basis, ME! I have all of these things that I know I want for myself.. you know kind of a list of goals or standards I have set for me and how I want people to treat me. BUT more often than not I let myself down and I let others treat me just any old way.
That's why I am so thankful for the people who take the time to get to know me and treat me with respect. The ones who know my flaws and don't take advantage of me. Now don't go thinkin' I'm weak, because I'm not, but I do have flaws. I know I am kind of rambling on this one.. not sure where I am going with it really, just writing to write I guess. I would just like to be someones priorty one of these days.
A fresh start.. a new month.. today is February 1, 2011. Make living it to the fullest a priority because it's the only one you will every get!
God
Family
Work
Then of course those are split up into categories.. like family -> kids first and then everyone else. My close friends are in this category too.
The one priority that I mess up with the most is God. So so many times I put everything else in front of Him even though I know better. But there is another priority that I seem to put low on my list on a regular basis, ME! I have all of these things that I know I want for myself.. you know kind of a list of goals or standards I have set for me and how I want people to treat me. BUT more often than not I let myself down and I let others treat me just any old way.
That's why I am so thankful for the people who take the time to get to know me and treat me with respect. The ones who know my flaws and don't take advantage of me. Now don't go thinkin' I'm weak, because I'm not, but I do have flaws. I know I am kind of rambling on this one.. not sure where I am going with it really, just writing to write I guess. I would just like to be someones priorty one of these days.
A fresh start.. a new month.. today is February 1, 2011. Make living it to the fullest a priority because it's the only one you will every get!
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