My Ah Ha Moment... Thanks Oprah (AND Shellee)

Ok honestly I don't really watch Oprah very much at all, but Nana does and she fills me in on the points she sees as relevant to me....

Today is another snow day.  While the kids are excited about it, I would rather be in school and get out for my summer!  I love warmer weather.  BUT I suppose it has given me some time to get some things done.  I could certainly clean house today...  more likely I will play, but I could clean house if I wanted to!  :) 

Now what was it I wanted to write about today?  Oh yeah my "ah ha moment".  I have them daily, but this one hit me just last night after a talk with my friend Shellee.  Are you ready?  This one is BIG! 

Everything is NOT always my fault! 

If I have questions about something and I ask the wrong way, that's because I am human.  If I my feelings get hurt and I want whoever to make things right.. that's because I am human.  It's not because of my past or any one in my past.  Of course I have issues; everyone has issues, but my issues are no worse (or better) than anyone elses.  As a a matter of fact, my biggest issue is being able to let people get close to me because I am scared to let my guard down.  THAT IS MY BIGGEST ISSUE!  Judge me if you want..  it's ok.  I have been judged before, but if you actually take the time to get to know me, you will see that I have a ton of other amazing qualities that out weigh that "issue". 

I'd like to take a minute to just go over the things that I do NOT have issues with.  OK here goes..
I do not have an issue with loyalty.  Once you are in, you are in! 
I do not have an issue with commitment.  (Actually if you look at my background.. I have been a little too committed at times.)
I do not have an issue with placing blame on others. (I usually place it on myself)
I do not have an issue with admitting I was wrong and apologizing. (I have even apologized to my children when I felt I had hurt them or done wrong by them.)
I do not have an issue with judging people.  (I even try to walk away from gossip.)
I do not have an issue with always having to be "right".
I do not have an issue with always being negative. 

Wow, I could go on for a while here. I'm thinking my "issues" don't seem quite so abnormal or large anymore.  I am not an easy shell to crack, but the people who have taken the time to truly know me have stuck with me for a very long time.  That's got to say something about me.  If I was wrong, I will admit it and apologize, but not everything is my fault.  Thankfully, I am not naive enough to buy into that theory.

Today is February 2, 2011. (Another snow day) Enjoy it!  It's the only one you will ever get! For me I see sledding, snow angels, snowball fights, and a snowman in my future! :)

Eating healthy stinks…

So my friend Kortney talked me into (ok she practically forced me into ;) going on a diet with her. Not that I don’t need to eat better, just that the whole idea of a “diet” makes me nauseous.

We are doing the “Flat Belly Diet”. It’s not really all that bad. I am learning a ton of stuff, and even dare I say it…. COOKING! Not just cooking, but cooking well! Today I have had Oatmeal with bananas and pecans, a muffin (yes homemade), a cheesy penne pasta spinach salad with pesto sauce, and red grapes. The day is only half-way over!

What I don’t like about it, it’s a diet. Ugh! I hate that word! What I like about it, I never get hungry! I love that! If I do it right and eat my “MUFUs” I stay full, and no lie, I feel better; not so tired and so on. What I "didn’t" like about it.. I had to CHANGE. YUCK! (Notice I said “didn’t”—I am S-L-O-W-L-Y learning to like this part of it.)

I am not big on change! Don’t get me wrong I like to try new things, but I usually try them and then go right back to my old habits. I like my comfort zone!

So questions for today: How do I make those changes? How do I get out of my comfort zone? Well.. here is what happened to me. God placed people who LOVE and CARE for me in my life. When I moved to Broken Arrow, I was dead set on keeping with some of my old ways and who should come along but Mrs. Kortney. Not only did she force me to come out of my shell a little bit and go on a dreaded diet with her, but she also reminds me daily that she’s not going anywhere. Thankfully I am stuck with her  no matter how hard I try to mess things up! There are a few other people like that in my life now and just between you and me, I really kinda like having them around.

Opening up is hard as heck for me.. well except when it comes to writing. So there ya go, that’s me for today 01/20/2011. Enjoy your day because it’s the only one you will ever get!

I get it! Oh wait, no I don't.

Hopefully I am not the only one who is constantly asking the following question… Ok God, what exactly are you trying to tell me? Sometimes I pray and ask for answers and God answers right away in a way that there is absolutely NO chance I could miss it! The minute I read the verse in the Bible, or the minute my friend makes that encouraging comment; I know right away that is the answer straight from God.

Other times I don’t get an answer at all. Well, at least not the answer I asked for and certainly not as quickly as I would have liked. Of course I don’t figure out that I wasn’t supposed to know the answer until later on when I am reminded that God really does know what he’s doing. He knows me way better than I could ever know myself. He knows what answers I am ready for and what answers need to wait.

What I am struggling with is the times when I feel like God is trying to tell me something and I am just not pickin’ up on what He’s puttin’ down. I have so many things in my head and I pray and ask for guidance, but sometimes I am just not sure what path to follow. Now deep down inside, I know that the struggle is really with what I want versus what God wants me to do.

Here’s the question: How do I truly know the difference?

Today is January 19, 2011! Enjoy it to the fullest, because it’s the only one you will ever get!